(CEO)— Great segment by Triumph “The Insult Comic Dog” and “The Daily Show” exposing undecided voters, at this point, for what they truly are…Insanely Frustrating! By now if you honestly can’t choose between President Biden and Donald Trump. Two candidates with Presidential records, easily available, to compare and contrast against one another. Whose vision of the country couldn’t be the more polar opposite of each other if one of them were blind from birth. Then you either haven’t put an ounce of effort into your determination or you’re possibly the most annoyingly indecisive individual walking the earth. If the latter is the case, you really should apologize to the rest of us in society patiently awaiting your answer. Seriously WTF are you still contemplating?
You have up until after tonight’s debate before we have no choice but to boycott you until further notice. Leaving you with plenty of free time and space to study all the essential evidence necessary to inform your Presidential pick. Even if you choose to flip a goddamn coin. At this point, anything that gets you to a final resolution will be honored as an acceptable answer. But this indecisive noncommital bull💩 must come to an immediate conclusion. Everyone else in your circle may be complicit in contributing to your hesitancy, but they definitely aren’t doing you any favors. I’m almost certain they are currently talking behind your back in a text chain you were never invited into. Since you are rapidly becoming the punchline of inside jokes, among your squad. Sadly because you are now an undecided Debbie Downer you might never find out those conversations ever existed.
It’s time we shake things up a bit since the normal method of picking a Presidential candidate. Has left you in the fetal position paralyzed by fear because a picket of the fence you’ve been sitting on is permanently stuck up your ass. Maybe it’s time to look at this Presidency from a different perspective. Instead of focusing on the candidates themselves. Try just examining the policy proposals from both parties but have the names removed from the two columns of agendas. Whichever ideas would be most beneficial to your current circumstances. Then VOILA you have the man you should elect. In the end, if you’re struggling because you don’t prefer either of the candidates make your selection based upon your own wellbeing. That way whoever your option is, it’s your life that will see improvement.
Time is ticking down though and tonight is your last chance before you yourself get voted onto the island misfit undecided voters. Where you will be surrounded by other irritating like-minded tentative people. Who will all most certainly starve to death due to the collective uncertainty over what to eat for the next meal. So do yourself, your friends, and your family all a favor and have your Presidential preference made by morning. I guarantee everyone you’re surrounded by in your life will seem friendlier and happier to be in your presence. I realize you’ll most likely be thankful for this wisdom. But don’t worry, you can thank me later, for now, just get your popcorn and drink of choice ready as soon as possible. Then find a cozy seat in front of the television because the debate will be starting soon enough. Then sit back and enjoy the drama-free political spectacle!
P.S.— If you find yourself struggling to select your drink of choice, just “eeny, meeny, miny, moe” it for Christ’s sake!!!
P.P.S. —BTW If somehow Trump is your ultimate selection. I have much worse news for you, you’re WRONG! Oh 💩, maybe I should’ve started with that!
The-Anti-Social-Media Pro-DEMOCRACY WING 